Gloom, Despair, and Agony on Me

I am having trouble reigning in my frustration and anger.

I know my SIL basically wants someone to do the work for her but I keep hoping that she will grow up. I know her mom and dad did not make her do anything (other than clean her room and I have my suspicions that her mom did that for her so her dad wouldn't go off on her) and I know that she cleans the kids rooms for them b/c she does not have the patience to make them do it themselves. I also know that people who have no kids should not judge but it is so stinking difficult!! I know I ticked off all three kids on Saturday but I told them it was my house and my rules and if they did not like it, tough. Guess what? It worked. The oldest one laid on the couch and watched the western channel (the only one I would put it on b/c I don't like the majority of the cartoons and did not have time to police the TV so, the western channel). The two younger ones played outside. Together. No fighting. No fussing. No hitting. No in your face all the time. My SIL was amazed b/c they don't do that at her house. You can't be your kids best friend, you have to be their mother and make the hard choices. It may not make them happy but, in the long run, they respect you and learn something. Sigh. I have talked it over with Will and we have decided that she is not going to do this again. This is the third time she has done this to me and I will not be used like this again. I have shown her how to make jelly. I have provided the Sure Jell and sugar and lids (some jars, too, that mysteriously did not make the journey back to my house so I told her I did not have any extras). I have worked and worked with her on how to boil down the berries and strain the juice so you don't have any seeds in it. I have provided all the equipment and the space. I have been patient (even when I wanted to scream and curse when she 'forgot' the jelly on the stove and it boiled over). But no more. It is her time to do for herself.

And it may be just because the frustration and anger is fresh but I have the support of Will and the wisdom of Mrs. Pat who said "There are some people who will use you and use you until you say enough is enough. Three times you have done this, she should be able to do it on her own now. If she can't, she needs to go to her mom because you are obviously not getting through to her."

Grace be with y'all and me b/c I need it now more than ever!!